Jun. 29th, 2015

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I was thinking about how, in the weeks after Enoch was born, I looked for lullabies to sing him that wouldn't make me weep piteously- hormones and tiny babies, don'tcha know. And eventually I stopped crying every 5 minutes and at every song, but I sometimes sought out the songs that made me cry - because the tenderness of those first weeks is too much for every minute of the day, but just right for invoking now and then. A little dip into those feelings makes me a better parent - more grateful, more gentle, with better perspective.

So, thanks to Billy Joel, Paul Simon, Dar Williams, Tori Amos, the "babies don't keep" poem, all of the things I have sung for peace and love and tears this year. I'm a better mother because of those songs and those moments, and even if my genetics betray me eventually, those memories are in my bones and it won't matter if my brain loses them.

This is my list of Enoch's sleeping songs.

"Lullabye" - Billy Joel
"Saint Judy's Comet" - Paul Simon
"Carry" - Tori Amos
"Songbird" - Fleetwood Mac
"Mercy of the Fallen" - Dar Williams
"The One who Knows" - Dar Williams
"Stay Awake" - Mary Poppins ;)
"Anthem for Baby" - Chris Dorman

He sleeps to the Unrepentant Geraldines album, and to a Norah Jones album, and to the Jack Johnson Pandora station in the car.

Sophie's sleep landscape was less peaceful, but I still sing her Morningtown Ride and "Lumina" by Joan Osborne every night, and those are good feelings.

Right now E is sleeping in my lap to the aforementioned Norah Jones album, having been up crying most of the morning. His third tooth is poking through at the corners, and I wish the rest would hurry up. But other than the fact that I have to pee, I'm glad he's finally peaceful...and I'm getting some internetting in. ;)

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mangofandango

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